At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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