they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
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