Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
