just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
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