I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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