the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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