I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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