glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
