I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
you didnt know i had herpes?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
