My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
