Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
