WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
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