My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
