going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
false alarm, still single
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
