naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
