Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
this just has baby written all over it
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Randomize
