Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
