D3 body, D1 cock
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Randomize
