I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
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