Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
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