Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
