Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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