In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
