I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize