He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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