the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Randomize
