Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
