Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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