Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
