How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
