Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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