I would go down on you faster than GM stock
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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