It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize