i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
