so explain again why im purple
no
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
