there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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