he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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