put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
