the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize
