Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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