people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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