It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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