Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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