I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
