The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
