Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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