You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
