i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Randomize
