If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
