tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
