the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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